Parent Coaching + Therapy

Dr. Shaneze Gayle Smith, PhD

I’m a trained child and adolescent therapist, and as a mom- I get how challenging parenting is.

Struggling With Parenting?

Parenting is one of the hardest (and most important) roles you will ever have, and yet, it's the one we often receive the least training and preparation for. Parenting is so overwhelming; a never ending road of unknowns. Sometimes it feels like you can’t catch a break.

How they get sick and are up all night right before a big work day or something important you need to do. How frustrating and embarrassing it feels when your child is throwing a tantrum in the middle of the grocery store (thank you Whole Foods delivery).

How to navigate sibling dynamics when they’re not getting along. Or the constant worry about their health, safety and well-being. Being on 24/7 is exhausting.

Do you find yourself saying:

  • “Will I ever get to live my old life or be me before becoming a parent?

  • "I lost my cool, and I don’t know what else to do."

  • "My child won’t listen, and I feel like I’m failing."

  • "My partner and I can’t agree on how to discipline our kids."

  • “I should have something fun planned for the kids at all times.”

  • “Am I making the right decision; is this best for my child?

  • “I want to give my child the childhood I didn’t have, but feeling stuck.”

If these thoughts are familiar, you’re not alone. I specialize in helping parents like you find practical solutions, find a balance between your needs and your child’s, build better relationships with your children, and feel more confident in your parenting.

I work with parents facing a variety of challenges, including:

  • Children and/or parents with ADHD / Neurodiverse

  • Academic difficulties/behavioral issues

  • Needing support in IEP or 504 for child

  • Perfectionism in parenting

  • Mom Guilt 

  • Conflict over parenting styles/disciplining

  • Work-life balance

  • Children with anxiety and/or OCD

  • Parent and/or child with health issues 

  • Parents with history of childhood trauma or abuse (cycle-breakers!)

Parent coaching provides tools and guidance so you can feel more equipped to handle the tough moments. I offer support for parents individually or as couples looking to develop specific skills, such as:

  • How to have difficult conversations with your child about sensitive topics

  • Regulating your emotions during stressful parenting moments

  • Navigating your own parenting style and aligning it with your values

  • Reducing conflict in marriage due to parenting differences

  • Skills on how to manage behavior issues such as tantrums, non-compliance/rule breaking

  • Process your own childhood and identify patterns you want to change

How Does My Parent Coaching Work?

Parent coaching sessions are tailored to your unique needs. We’ll dive into:

  • Your relationship with your child: Are they listening to you? Are they warm and connected, or are there constant conflicts? Do they open up to you and share with you what’s going on?

  • Your emotional regulation: How are you handling your own stress and reactions? Are you struggling with your own anxiety, depression, ADHD or health issues and parenting is too overwhelming?

  • Your childhood: How does your own upbringing influence your parenting today? The word “childhood” can elicit tons of different emotions particularly for those who had a difficult one. Have you processed yours or are you noticing your unresolved childhood trauma is triggering unhealthy parenting habits?

  • Your relationship with your partner: Are you having frequent disagreements with your partner about parenting decisions? How do your parenting styles align or clash? What is the toll that parenting has taken on your relationship? Is intimacy lacking and you’re feeling disconnected?

Parent Coaching & Child Therapy Techniques I Use

  • PMT is a treatment program for changing parenting behavior, improving parent-child bond,and teaching parents how to improve their preschool and school-age child’s behavioral issues. Parents are trained in how to reinforce positive and desirable behaviors and effective discipline strategies by giving clear, effective commands and consistently manage noncompliance.

  • Trauma-informed, neurodiversity affirming model of care that helps caregivers focus on identifying the problems that are causing concerning behaviors in kids and solving those problems collaboratively and proactively.

  • To challenge inaccurate or unhelpful thinking patterns about your parenting.

  • To build emotional regulation skills for yourself and your child.

  • To help you accept what’s developmentally appropriate for your child while aligning your actions with your values.

  • To explore how your relationship with your caregivers might affect your parenting today and how to form healthy secure attachment with your child.

  • This treatment approach that builds on attachment theory is specifically for couples to build strong, healthy relationships by exploring and changing emotional dynamics to enhance mutual understanding and closeness.

You Don’t Have to Be a Perfect Parent.
You Just Have to Be Present.

Society places so much pressure on parents to be perfect, but the truth is, your child doesn’t need perfection. What they need is your presence—your ability to be there, to admit when you’re wrong, and to model growth and emotional resilience.

Working with me can help you:

  • Be confident in your parenting choices

  • Develop healthy ways to manage your own stress and emotions

  • Build warmer relationships with your child

  • See improvements in your child’s behavior 

You’ll also learn how to model emotional regulation so your child can follow your lead. It’s about creating a calmer home environment where you and your child can thrive.

About Dr. Shaneze Gayle Smith

Read More About Me

I am licensed to provide therapy in 41 states.

With over a decade of experience as a trained child and adolescent psychologist, I’ve helped families navigate everything from ADHD and anxiety, OCD to chronic illnesses. My medical background allows me to offer an integrative pediatric approach, supporting both emotional and physical health. I’ve worked in hospitals, with children facing life-threatening illnesses, and now focus on helping parents build the skills they need to support their children and themselves.

Education

  • PhD in Clinical Psychology, Seton Hall University (Health Psychology & Child/Adolescent Focus)

  • Psychology Residency, Albert Einstein College of Medicine/Montefiore Medical Center

  • MS in Forensic Psychology, Walden University

  • Medical School (3 years), Rutgers-New Jersey Medical School

  • BA in Cell Biology and Neuroscience, Rutgers University

Credentials

  • Trained in Parent-Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT) techniques, Parent Management Training (PMT) and Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS)

  • Trained in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

  • Extensive experience with children facing medical and emotional challenges

Let’s work together to give your child the childhood they deserve, while helping you rediscover the joy of parenting.

  • Parent-only interventions can be quite effective in improving children's behavior, particularly when they focus on teaching parents specific strategies and skills for managing their child's behavior. Research has shown that these interventions can lead to improvements in various areas, including reductions in aggression, decrease anxiety, noncompliance, and other behavioral issues. You as the parent have a huge role in helping your child. As a child and adolescent therapist, I used to work with many children who would behave differently in sessions with me compared to their parents. Often, parents would be shocked or frustrated (like sooo they do know how to listen?). But really, your child will always test limits with you. You’re their safe space and as such, it’s important for you to be equipped with the tools to manage your child’s behavior.

  • SO MUCH!! Research has shown a parent’s mental and physical health is one of the STRONGEST predictors of a child's overall health. More so than race, ethnicity, SES, family structure, parents level of education, and household income. Yes. You at your best= your child at their best. Parent coaching or therapy is one of the best investments you could be making for your family.

  • Parent coaching focuses on here and now and learning skills specifically to help aid your child’s behaviors or difficulties. In therapy, we do the same thing but there’s more of an initial  focus on your mental health and well-being. If you’re finding that you’re just overwhelmed with day to day parent tasks or require support with a child's ADHD or accommodations at school then coaching would likely be the next step. However, if you’re struggling with your mental health (struggling with low mood, difficulty getting out of bed or engaging/playing with your child, crying spells about your parenting, constant anxiety) then therapy would likely be recommended to make sure you’re in great headspace first. Reach out to discuss more!

  • You can do either! Couples therapy can help any couple (with or without children). Parent coaching is specific to parents struggling with their relationship due to parenting issues. Parenting has a huge impact on the dynamic of the couple. It’s no surprise that marital satisfaction plummets during the childrearing years. Lack of sleep, lack of time together, financial stressors….those factors then impact how you communicate to one another and cause a much shorter fuse. Conflicting parenting styles are a huge source of tension in relationships and can be hard to find the middle ground.

    Just because you became a parent doesn’t mean your relationship needs to suffer. Reach out so you and your partner feel more in control and more at peace with your parenting style and your relationship overall.

FAQs About Parent Coaching